My own private Emocide

so, wtf is all that supposed to mean now. i just dont get it anymore. maybe i dont get ME anymore. that combined with other people’s irrational behavior… i guess it spells trouble. if only it was on a scale, where you have to pay a traffic ticket. but this is a fucking life decision. how is a single person supposed to deal with this shit? rebecca says: “you just do it”. is it really that simple? i wish. i really do. it’s probably cos i am a fucking idiot — a moron, when it comes to making decisions. decision-retarded i guess. emotionally overloaded. who would have thought, that 5 months into this, i would still be dealing with that same nagging question.